Happy Christmas to all my Tumblr followers and friends, whatever you believe in, may next year 2017 be a uplifting and inspiring, may your health bloom and your prospects grow.
Here is some Happy Fluffy, feel good, nonsense for Christmas,
Tom look around at the happy eager faces and decided once again that
despite government intervention and all the boring paperwork they now had to
complete, being a teacher was the best job in the world.
This time of year was especially wonderful, as the kids were full of
expectation for the festive season and he got to do the fun stuff with them.
Such as decorating the classroom room with giant Santa’s covered in cotton wool
and red paint. The Stain Glass windows that now filled the room with many
colours, depicting the nativity scenes from the traditional Christmas tale.
Tinsel covered every book case and surface, and edged every picture frame.
Large baubles that the children had painstakingly made with much glitter and
glue, hung from the ceiling.
Tom himself had gone home most nights for the past three weeks covered in paint
and glitter, laughing to himself in the shower as he tried to remove some of
the more stubborn stains and as the floor of his flat happily sparkled where he
walked.
But the very best was yet to come. Over the past five weeks the children and
Tom of class “Cheerful Sparrows” with the help of two brave Teaching assistants,
had been practicing every day so they could perform the Christmas play.
Each child had a part, Tom tried to encourage even the shyest of his small
charges to stand up and have a go.
He had started by sitting his merry group of actors down on the carpet and
explained to the rather excited five and six year olds, what they were going to
do.
“Ok my troupe of Merry thespians”
“What Sir?” As ever Chloe was the first to have a question.
“Actors and actresses Chloe, you are going to perform to your mum’s and dad’s a
play for Christmas”
“Could’ve just said that then” She wriggled a bit and waited for Tom to speak
again.
“Now would someone like to tell me what Christmas is all about?” He asked
knowing what was coming but you had to let them have a go.
“Wayne?”
“Well Sir it’s about Santa bringing presents, and food, and arguments over
overcooked turkey”
“How about the very first Christmas before Santa got his mojo on, what made
Santa do it” Tom turned and looked at the windows they done behind him, and
then pointed to a boy with hair that had not been brushed in weeks, without his
hand up and got the reply
“My mum says it was just a way of getting Santa out the house, so Mrs Santa can
cook Christmas dinner in peace. So Mrs Santa started it” told him
“Before any of the Santa family got involved, what is the story of Christmas”
Ok sometimes teaching was tough going.
“Chloe enlighten us” Chloe’s hand had been waving like a daffodil in the wind
since he’d asked the question.
“It’s about Mary, Joseph three kings a few Shepherds a very bright angel, and
the baby Jesus”
At this point you could see all the kids thinking, Oh that story, why didn’t he
just say and to be honest Tom was thinking the same.
“Yes Chloe the story of the baby Jesus, before all the decorated trees, Santa,
food and feasting, before….”
“Before Coco Cola Sir?” Asked Simon
“Before Coco Cola”
“Wow that is old” Simon looked impressed.
“Before it all came the baby Jesus, Gods son” Tom then sat and read them the
story, and as ever when Tom told a story he had the whole class totally
enthralled.
He went on to read them a second version from the innkeepers point of view. A
very grumpy innkeeper, which Tom made the children all laugh at, because he was
not at all pleased with how his night was going. All the noise and disturbance
from visitors asking for rooms he didn’t have and the others who wanted to see
these new visitors that he’d put out back in the stable. In the end the
truculent fellow went out to see what all the lights, singing and annoyance was
about, only to find the baby Jesus and be awestruck by him. Cue big nativity
scene and cute ending.
This was the story the children would be telling to their parents in just a few
short weeks.
Casting was not easy as every child wants to be a star, until placed on the
stage. Then some look like rabbits in headlights, some yell hello to mum,
others stand and forget why they were there and some simply turn and flee back
to the safety of the wings.
Chloe of course was Mary, she who would speak out. let’s face it if Tom had
made anyone else Mary and they had got it wrong on the night, she would have
taken over the part and shown them how it was done.
Brian was Joseph as there was just a chance he’d stand up to Mary and get to
say his lines.
The innkeeper was much more difficult and Tom had thought long and hard about
it. He was in effect the star of this production and he wanted desperately to
give a chance to a child who would normally be at the back watching others
shine.
So the innkeeper was to be Justin the little boy with the messy hair.
Tom told them their parts and then retold the story with as much
characterization as he could, to give the children an idea of how their parts
should be acted.
There was no real script, Tom had a narrator, Simon read Tom’s version of the
story bit by bit and in between the little actors rushed around the stage
ad-libbing their lines.
Chloe as expected had the most to say, some of which had to be heavily edited
by Tom to avoid embarrassing parents on the night. Brian did his best to get a
few words in not easy with his Mary, taking center stage and point blank
refusing to let it go.
The biggest surprise was Justin who having really only ever said anything to
anyone if he was asked to, took up the character of the grumpy Innkeeper and
did it proud. Tom did jokingly ask who he had modeled it on and got the reply.
“Me Granddad, he could be miserable for Britain my mum says”
Nuff said Tom thought.
The little girls playing angels didn’t like the song they were singing so the
teaching assistant asked them for an alternative to “Away in a manger” the
traditional song at the nativity scene
“I saw mummy kissing Santa Claus” was rejected and so was Beyonces “If you like
it you should have put a ring on it” Chantelle was far from pleased as her and
all the angels knew all the moves to the dance. “The fairytale of New York” was
also rejected in the end they all settled on “Mary’s boy child” which give the little cherubs their due they
nailed!
The Shepherds lead by Wayne went on strike when they saw that the Kings had
fake facial hair, Wayne told Tom
“You’re not likely to get a decent Wilkinson Sword razor in a field are you”
And again Tom really couldn’t argue, so beards lovingly made in art time would
be available to all who wanted one, including Stephanie who had insisted on
joining the boys under the rules of equality.
The three Wise men/Kings took their roles a little too seriously. They had to be
taken aside in the playground one lunchtime and told by Tom, that the boys that
carried their stuff as servants behind them in the play, did not have to do so
with their books, bags and lunches for the rest of the day. The three look
rather displeased and their overworked servants shot off to play football while
they could.
Now was the big day, the opening (and closing) night and Toms Cheerful Sparrows
all looked like they were about to be shot. Even Chloe dresses in a long blue
gown and a matching head scarf, looked more than a little nervous at the
thought of going on stage.
Time for a Tom’s team talk and warm up.
“My fellow thespians”
“He means us” Chloe told the class
“Yes I do, thank you Chloe. My fellow thespians today is your day, a day to go
show the world that you are that Angel, Sheppard, nervous Mary and Joseph about
to have a baby in a stable away from home…..”
“Kings what about the Kings?”
“Or a King meeting the saviour of the world…..”
“He didn’t do a very good job of that did he?” Nigel shouted from the back
slightly muffled by a large fake beard and the sheep he brought from home he’d
been hugging for comfort.
“Um….well maybe like you lot we should have been listening more and talking
less” Tom told him
“Good answer” whispered the Teaching assistant as she attached the last set of
silver foil wings to Chantelle, who was humming the Beyonce song and trying to
dance as the wings went on.
“Anyway whatever you are believe in your part and give them your all, go be
grumpy Justin”
To get you all loosened up let’s play a game and for the next ten minutes he
had them dancing to as Chloe put it,
“That awful music old folk like him like” All laughing like drains.
Tom walked them back stage in silence and went out to introduce his Merry band
of performers to their public.
“Ladies and gentlemen, mums, dad’s, grannies grandpa’s and all, Welcome to
Cheerful Sparrows Christmas play. Sit back and enjoy the humbling tale we are
about to unfold before your very eyes.” At which point you could hear Chloe say in a loud whisper that could be heard across the school hall,
“He sure can waffle on” and the audience sniggered.
“Without further ado, I place you in the hands of our players”
Simon walked on to the stage with a serious air, placed his book solemnly on
the headmaster’s lectern and began to read.
The little actors took to the stage and gave it their all. Mary did yell at
Joseph that,
“if he’d booked like she told him
they wouldn’t be in this bloody pickle” which had been edited out in rehearsals
but she’d felt the need to replace it.
There was also the minor mishap with the grumpy Innkeeper falling over his
bedding, as he rushed out to answer his door yet again. He ended up on the
floor where a muffled
“Bollocks” came from under the covers.
The Wise men couldn’t quite control their servants, who staged a bit of a coupe
and told their bosses to carry their own stuff from now on, they were off. Not
once had this been done in rehearsals but Tom felt the kings had it coming and
just laughed with the audience.
The angels looked angelic, apart from a bit of knicker adjustment and nasal
exploring, wiped happily down the white gown before singing ….well like an
angel.
And at the end came the big final scene, where the innkeeper stomped in angrily to his stable to find all who were there that night, which included, Mary and Joseph the proud
parents, three Kings, some disgruntled servants, a flock of Shepherds, a host
of heavenly angel’s, Ox, Ass, camels, sheep, three squirrel and a badger. All gathered round the holy, if some what plastic child.
Justin stormed in face as black as thunder, he was as grumpy as hell and ready to tell the world about it, but that was before
looking upon the plastic Jesus in his Manger, when his face lit up with the
most amazing smile Tom had ever seen, and he said.
“Well would you look at that, he’s a beauty”
Which made every grown up in the room go ah!!!
The players kept their places in the stable, as Tom stood in front and said the
thank you’s to mums for helping with costumes, to the two tired teaching assistant
who received boxes of chocolates delivered by angels and everyone for coming.
Tom then got his Happy Sparrows to bow and take their Applause, they wished one
and all a happy Christmas and left the stage. At which point he noticed a small
puddle behind one of the shepherds, unfortunately so did Chloe, so the audience
were left with the words.
“Chris has done it again Sir, he’s piddled on the stage”
<pictures not mine I just played and the glasses do make him look like a teacher.
“lol the only people mad about the tumblr announcement just want porn lol”
Yeah, no.
Tumblr blocked the tag “chronic pain” in this mess for no reason
They’re flagging commonly used tags by queer people, sex educators, and artists who make their fucking LIVING on tumblr
They’re gonna take down genuine sex workers because they didn’t curb
the problem with spamming porn bots YEARS ago when tumblr users REPORTED
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND *OVER* that it was a problem
Tumblr
IGNORED the bots, IGNORED the problems, and honestly treated it like
NOTHING until their app was taken off a store due to it.
They’re
fucking over a shit-ton of REAL PEOPLE who rely on tumblr for community
and/or income because they ignored users’ complaints about shitty porn
bots for YEARS until it had financial consequences
I can no longer even talk about chronic pain without the post being blocked from searches
I have drawn one or two nude pieces on my art tumblr which is 99% safe
for work but now I’m worried the blog will be taken down entirely
because Tumblr won’t bother differentiating between spam and REAL PEOPLE
just trying to live their goddamn lives
And god forbid I want to
talk about bisexuality or sex or kink in just… MY LIFE. As a
normal-ass human being who just wants to TALK ABOUT HUMAN THINGS
No, their solution to nuke a problem they’ve ignored for years is to take us all down at once
So maybe don’t laugh about “oh no not my pornz” because 1. plenty of
that ~porn~ is made by actual humans making their living and 2. WAY MORE
than “just porn” is being targeted
This along with Facebook
continuously upholding white supremacy by letting nazi shit fly by while
they ban people for speaking out against their oppressors and it’s
basically like we’re running out of truly free places to just… BE
An open letter to Tumblr @staff@support regarding fandom censorship
In lumping film and television media into the same category as p*rn you are essentially saying that any form of nudity (even non-sexual), sensuality, intimacy, or love-making is intrinsically *bad* and subject to possible censorship.
You’re saying that respected, and often award winning film makers; the actors and actresses involved; film crews and everyone else working on it; plus any TV station or film company who goes on to distribute this work is peddling p*rn and that we, as an audience, should be ashamed of watching it.
You’re saying that these same respected artists’ work is somehow dirty and should be hidden away.
You’re saying that any form of naked skin or show of affection is subject to possible censorship. That anyone under the age of 18 should never have access to this sort of material. That consensual, loving affection and the human body is something to be hidden away. Yet the vast majority of tv shows and films that I make gifs and edits from are rated PG or 12A here in the UK. Some are rated 15. NONE of my content is rated 18.
You’re basically saying that a 15, 16 and 17 year old should no longer have access to this material – material that actually offers a much more realistic view of relationships than any p*rn could.
**Newsflash** They CAN and they DO. Many of them actually post this content themselves!
It’s not Tumblr’s job to parent these young adults. Of course there should be safeguards in place, on any site. But it’s not fair to penalise an entire site because you can’t set up an effective safeguarding infrastructure for minors. Sort out your safe search and, or limit/tier the age of audiences.
Furthermore. You try to justify your decision by saying one of the reasons is to tackle the overwhelming amount of p*rn on the site. The problem with that, Tumblr staff, is that you allowed it! You made money from it. Your advertising revenues – and let’s be transparent here because that is the only thing you care about – profited from the footfall that came along with the p*rn blogs. You’ve ignored the much more troublesome and vile factions on this site, allowing them instead to flourish simply because either: a) you genuinely don’t care; or b) you haven’t invested in the technology and manpower needed to eradicate the threat.
Now I personally have no problem with any consenting adults doing whatever they want on this site, providing they stay in their lane.
Your decision to now turn this site into a highly censored space is nothing more than a cynical knee jerk reaction to Apple calling you out on the problems you’ve long since swept under the carpet. Things that your community have been begging you to fix for years. And yes, it boils down to money again.
But what about the innocent users you are punishing for your own ineptitude?
To be clear. I’m not here for p*rn. I’m here because I found a sanctuary from my debilitating illness. I found a like-minded community of amazing, creative people who just so happen to also enjoy a particular actor’s work and his positive attitude to life.
Many users on this site are house bound or isolated in one way or another. Many suffer from anxiety, depression and other illnesses. Many are marginalised in society and have no other way of communicating with people who ‘get them’. Tumblr has, historically, been a place for these people to come together as a community.
It has also been a place where many fandoms flourished. Tumblr is a haven for fans to create art, writing, images, videos and gifs in celebration of the things they are passionate about. These passions often have a positive impact on these fans lives. Of course, there can be dramas. That’s not isolated to this site. But ultimately Tumblr has been a safe space for many people to communicate with others around the world and make long-lasting friendships.
Your blanket censorship is going to seriously affect this. People are running scared. They’re leaving in droves.
Finally, if you think for one second that this puritanical purge will eradicate the spam p*rn bots, you’re deluded. How are you intending to achieve this when these bots don’t even post nsfw material? They simply reblog legitimate, sfw posts and delete captions only to insert their own insidious links? Your community guidelines state that explicit language will not be censored.
In short, there is literally NO rational argument for this ridiculous change, other than that you are putting revenue before the established communities on this site, and we will NOT go quietly into the night.
Since a lot of blogs were deleted and copyright violation notices are still going out, I’ve put together a private network for Tom Hiddleston and Marvel fans. Please join if you’re interested. You can access it with any browser or with the mobile app.
Do NOT put in your real location when joining unless you’re okay with other members seeing it. Even if you set it to private, the info is still in your profile. I wish I could disable that, but I can’t.
Click here to join. If you’re more a Marvel fan than a Tom fan, no worries. There’s a group in there for you (it’s basically a network within a network…kind of hard to explain, but I promise we have space for you too).
I didn’t think to mention this (sorry!) but you can use any name you want. A lot of people are using their Tumblr names.
Can you reblog this if you see it so people are aware? If you’ve already signed up and you want to change your name, just edit your profile 🙂
We’ve got 300+ members now…and a working mobile app 😉
In light of Tumblr’s new policy, I’d thought I’d send this around again. NSFW content is allowed, we have a working app, and I’m working on a list of feature requests.
Lokiwholockfactory @ Tumblr - circa 2012-2018 